Best/Worst Places to See a Naked Guy

Best/Worst Places to See a Naked Guy

If you've been living under a particularly strict firewall, you might have somehow avoided hearing about Dictator Wiener's draconian new "towel" policy. It's all well and good to be going au natural, spake he, but if you must sit, please place a towel between yourself and any unsuspecting piece of furniture (or passersby).

But wait! You say. Since when do we need this rule in the first place? The only tanned jelly-rolls I ever see are on the shelves at Dynamo Donuts.

Don't worry, friends. If ever you wanted to see a random naked dude, here are some places to stake out:

1. The Folsom Street Faire--The last Sunday of every September, San Francisco's hottest leather daddies (and mommas) strut their stuff. Get flogged by a stranger for five bucks, or just stand back and marvel at all the different uses for lampshades in this day and age.

2. The Castro Street Faire--A little more mellow than Folsom, Castro will take place this year on October 2. It's got all the trappings of a whiter-breaded faire (music, dancing, and the like), but also a "freaky petting zoo" and an urban cowboy contest. Don't miss it!

3. Hunky Jesus Contest, Dolores Park--Happy Easter! Be a good congregation member and do your part to crown SF's newest, hunkiest Jesus. Bonus points for Peeps.

4. Castro Street...pretty much any day of the week--The denizens of birthday suits that inspired Wiener's towel rule in the first place get their kicks by gallivanting around the Castro in next to nothing. Go ahead and stare--or buy them some Hot Cookie underoos if you feel that strongly about it.

San Francisco Hotels
Check In
Check Out